Feb 052013
 

closeencounters2554I’ve always had strong religious sentiments. I guess the term would be “spiritual”, but it sounds like a stupid word for someone who doesn’t believe in the supernatural. I sometimes feel jealous of the reality-minded folks who’s brains aren’t susceptible to a spiritual hijack. So I’m somewhat proud of a recent(ish) victory over my irrational tendencies.

I was smoking out on the patio (back then I was a smoker) late one night when a bright light appeared above and behind me – I couldn’t see the source because it was close to the roof but behind the peak of the building, just a bit out of sight. It acted and felt very much like an alien craft. My heart started racing and I got that first little burst of adrenaline when you know some bad shit is about to go down. My intuitive systems knew I was in the presence of extra-terrestrial life.

Of course I knew this isn’t what’s actually happening. But knowing something isn’t real, and feeling it are two completely different things. I tried to wrestle my intuitive system into submission. Asking myself “What are the chances that an incredibly sophisticated alien race has come to this planet secretly, crossing trillions of miles, just to abduct me? Now what are the chances that I’m over-reacting to some sort of visual illusion? Even the chances of a stranger playing an elaborate hoax on me are astronomically greater than a real abduction scenario! Heck, I’m more likely to be spontaneously going insane and seeing things. We have proof of that happening all the time, but never has there been any solid proof of alien visitation.”

The sense of Alien didn’t actually go away. Emotional beliefs are irrational bastards. But I didn’t do anything stupid – I realized my Elephant was throwing a fit, and just held on until it was over.

This sort of “recognize the error and let it pass” has been extremely useful in real-life circumstances as well. A couple months back I was feeling suffocated in my relationship. I wanted out, saw all the upsides of leaving, and noticed that there were almost no downsides. Fortunately I had experience with this sort of lurch before, and I knew on an intellectual level that this was wrong. This is by far the most amazing relationship I’ve ever been in, and it’s nothing but awesome. This was just a temporary fit of insanity, and I would soon regret acting upon it. So I did nothing. I continued as if everything was normal and waited for the insanity to pass. A week later it went away and I was once again happy, and relieved that I was able to outwit my insidious back-stabbing Elephant. It took some learning, but I can learn, and he’s stuck with just the same old bag of tricks.

Jan 312013
 

happy farmI fear the universe runs on TGGP’s “Asskicking Theory of Morality” which states that the moral consideration things get is directly proportional to their ability to kick asses. Which is why animals and children have no moral weight to humans, aside from what allies they can seduce with their cuteness. I don’t WANT that to be the case, for the normal Sci-Fi geek reasons – if we run into a much more powerful species, I’d like for them to respect us not for our ass-kicking ability, but purely because we are also sentient creatures. Especially since I consider it entirely possible that we’ll create a much more powerful form of life within this century.

As such, I feel like a hypocrite if I don’t likewise give moral consideration to weaker species who show signs of sentience. But while sentience is hard to measure, I don’t think most animals qualify. Certainly not chickens and cattle. Unfortunately this isn’t the only problem with eating meat.

Obviously hunting is right out. If you hunt an animal, you’ve just killed a free-acting agent (for very loose definitions of agent) for your own gain without giving it anything in return. You are a parasite of nature. A farmer, on the other hand, has given a lot in return. He’s protect the animal from predators and disease. He’s given it land to live on, and food to eat, and a life much easier than the animals who have to claw and scrabble for life in the wild. And, ultimately, he bred the animal and gave it life – if it wasn’t for the farmer it wouldn’t have existed in the first place. So it’s not nearly so bad, it’s almost a transaction.

Sadly, in practice this isn’t the case. The ideal case is the Disney Family Farm, but in reality most factory farms are torture chambers. An animal is born into torment, tortured their entire lives, and then slaughtered. I’d rather have never existed than to be created solely to be tortured for years and then killed for someone else’s profit. That’s the stuff of Horror Sci Fi.

So for years I’ve kept circling around a conclusion I don’t want to embrace – I should change my eating habits. At the very least buy from better sources. And yet I still haven’t implemented that. I’m still searching for the hack that’ll work on my Elephant. I can see the destination, but not the road.

Jan 292013
 

elephant in crowdOne of the advantages of realizing that you’re riding atop an unwieldy mass of urges is that you can stop blaming yourself for lapses of willpower and start actually fixing the situation. If you know that the elephant you’re riding gets dizzy near ditches and sometimes fall into them, it’s stupid to berate yourself for not being a strong enough driver to keep the elephant on course as you’re skirting the edge of a ditch. The reasonable thing to do is keep the elephant on the other side of the road, away from the damn ditch! There’s absolutely no reason to go riding right up to the edge if you can avoid it.

What does this mean in practice? I love pastries. Sometimes I’ll see them as I’m grocery shopping, and I’ll want to buy some. But I realize that if I buy those donuts… I will eat them. There is no reason for me to go digging that ditch and placing it right in the middle of my kitchen where I can fall into it every time I walk past it. So I keep going and soon they are forgotten.

It is remarkable how much easier and more productive life becomes when you purge your surroundings of all the things that trip you up. In the world of the internet, you no longer need cable to watch a series you like. This means you can get rid of TV entirely and not lose anything you care about – all you’re doing is removing the stream of passive content that distracts you and grabs your elephant’s tail. In fact, most “stuff” people own falls into this category. Generally, you don’t need it. Every belonging has a weight, it has a cost associated with being kept around. It’s taking up square-footage in your house, it makes it harder to find the things you actually need, and it’s using up psychological resources by vying for your attention. Every single item you own should be paying rent to you in utility to justify its costs. If it is not paying rent it needs to be evicted, promptly. Throw it away.

From a recent profile:

“You’ll see I wear only gray or blue suits,” he said. “I’m trying to pare down decisions. I don’t want to make decisions about what I’m eating or wearing. Because I have too many other decisions to make.” He mentioned research that shows the simple act of making decisions degrades one’s ability to make further decisions. It’s why shopping is so exhausting. “You need to focus your decision-making energy. You need to routinize yourself. You can’t be going through the day distracted by trivia.”

Things can be kept for aesthetic value – a nice decoration is providing you utility in joy or status. Don’t let it go crazy, and remember that anything in storage rather than on display is NOT doing this.

When I was single I would move every year. This quickly gets you in the habit of paring down your possessions to what you actually want and need, and it’s less than you probably think. Yes, there’s a tiny chance that item may come in useful some day. Throw it out (or sell it) anyway, and when you need it you can simply GO OUT AND BUY IT AGAIN (or simply rent it!). As long as it’s not insanely expensive you probably saved more in space & psychological costs by not having to store it in those intervening years! If you have a hard time deciding if an item is useful or not, ask yourself when you last used it was. If you can’t remember, it’s likely not worth keeping.

When you have less to trip over you can move more efficiently, and your Elephant will thank you.

Jan 242013
 

doggy swimIt can be fun to talk to your dog. You can ask him things like “what the heck are you barking at the door for?” and know he won’t answer, can’t even understand what you want. It can be frustrating to teach a dog a new trick. You can tell a person “If you push that lever, the tennis ball will launch for you”, but you can’t tell your dog. You have to get him to push it himself with all sorts of bribes and trickery until he understands the relation. And you can’t ever negotiate with the dog for anything, even if he wanted to.

I used to think of myself as an agent, rather than a collection of biological drives. I would ask myself “Why am I so depressed?” or “Why can’t I just do X?” and search my internal mental state for an answer. Even when I thought I got one, it didn’t matter. The vast majority of oneself is a kludge of evolved impulses and reactions. A common metaphor used is that of the Rider on an Elephant. The thinking part of you is a Rider that can guide the Elephant – the rest of you – but you can’t force an Elephant to do a damn thing, and you can’t talk to it and negotiate with it. Trying to reason myself into action was like trying to explain to my dog that pushing that lever would get him a tennis ball. It simply doesn’t work.

But that doesn’t mean you’re helpless. A skilled Rider can get his Elephant to go where he wants. Start treating yourself just as you would treat an irrational animal that has to be tricked and bribed into being useful. The first thing I had to learn to do was realize what things hurt, and stop doing them. It sounds easy, but it can be the damndest thing in the world once you’ve lived with pain for so long that you’ve grown to embrace it. Many of the most moving songs will hurt to listen to. I used to love them and turned them up – now I quickly change away. I’ve found that nostalgia hurts the same way, and now I avoid it whenever I can rather than seeking it out. Cityscapes at night are bad – I avoid driving at night, and I keep my shades drawn and my lights very bright after dark.

None of this makes a bit of sense. There’s no reason those things should hurt, many people enjoy them thoroughly. But you can’t talk to your dog and explain why he shouldn’t jump in the pool. Eventually you can train him to stay by your side, but there’s no point in getting infuriated with the poor dog when you haven’t trained him and let him run free and he dives into the water. At first all you can do is keep him away from the pool. That is step one.

Jan 232013
 

coexistenceWe interrupt the regularly scheduled stream-of-consciousness for stupid politics.

The creationist fucktards are bringing the battle into Colorado. Are we gonna let them sneak this shit through?

 

Just a few days ago, a bill was introduced into my home state’s legislature that would allow teachers “to miseducate students about evolution, whether by teaching creationism as a scientifically credible alternative or merely by misrepresenting evolution as scientifically controversial.

 

The antiscience bill HB 13-1089 is one of the Orwellian-named “Academic Freedom” thrusts by creationists, where legislators claim they just want teachers to have freedom about what they can teach, but is in fact a clear and obvious attack on scientific fields that disagree with the beliefs of the conservative lawmakers.

 

HELL NO. The list of Reps sitting on the House Committees on Education and Appropriations is at the above link. If you don’t know what District you live in, the Colorado District Map is here.

Everyone in Colorado with a Rep sitting on this committee – write them. Email is good, snail mail is even better. Let them know we enjoy living in the NOT dark ages.

 

Jan 182013
 

ThundercatsPicture1aChildren have no taste at all. It is why they are constantly successfully marketed cheap crap. You don’t realize this until your taste grows. As a kid, I loved ThunderCats. A couple years ago, I decided to go back and watch it again. Word of warning to anyone thinking of doing this – just keep your happy memories. Upon review you will be sorely disappointed that what you loved so much is actually complete garbage.

Food is the same way. Kids love simple globs of stuff that are high in fat and/or sugar. Most candy simply tastes bad (can PixieStix even be called a “candy”?). I used to like McDonalds food – even just ten years ago! Now I can barely eat it. And conversely, I used to hate a lot of things that I now eat regularly.

I’m sure this doesn’t ever stop… currently I don’t taste much difference between wines, a $10 bottle is as good as a $40 bottle. Eventually this will probably change, and I hope I have more disposable income when that happens. :)

Why am I dissing on kids out of nowhere? Well, I had forgotten that I hadn’t quite finished my thoughts on value drift. I was reminded by a reply to a long-passed comment about Permutation City. I consider it a horror novel, because one of the major messages I got from it was thus: even if you never physically die, eventually over eternity one of these two things will happen –

1) your utility function will drift enough, and your memories fade and change enough, they you will be unrecognizable as the person you were. You as you are now will effectively be dead.

2) you will successfully resist change, and will be stuck thinking and doing the same things endlessly in a loop. You might as well be dead. Or preserved as a memory-diamond statue.

Even if we defeat death, living long enough is essential death anyway. You are doomed, there is no escape.

Wei Dei replied:

Isn’t that just due to the author’s inability to imagine/describe a mind capable of becoming increasingly and unboundedly complex without losing its identity?

Which is also the conclusion I eventually came to. The six-year old who liked ThunderCats is dead. The teenage who liked McDonalds is dead. Even the mid-twenties guy who loved World of Warcraft and disliked physical exercise is dead. Not one of them would have chosen to die so that I could live. But looking back, those lives are poorer and less valuable than the life I have now. And I have little doubt that the more complex person who will take my place will have an even richer and more valuable life than I do.

My values will drift, and I will become a different person. But I will be a better person. My morals will be better than those of my predecessors, my knowledge will be less wrong, and my contributions more valuable. That is a good thing.

Jan 162013
 

looters-killedCurrently the 2nd Amendment is interpreted by the Supreme Court as guaranteeing a right to self-defense. This is precisely why concealed-carry is protected by the 2nd Amendment, but RPGs are not. There is no need for concealed-carry if you’re arming the populace to stop a tyranny, and there IS a need for RPGs. The protection is exactly backwards.

From the recent overturning of Illinois’ concealed-carry ban:

“We are disinclined to engage in another round of historical analysis to determine whether eighteenth-century America understood the Second Amendment to include a right to bear guns outside the home,” wrote Posner. “The Supreme Court has decided that the amendment confers a right to bear arms for self-defense, which is as important outside the home as inside.”
In 2010, the U.S. Supreme Court made Chicago’s 28-year-old handgun ban unenforceable, ruling that Americans have the right to have guns in their homes for protection.

While there are some people who argue that military-grade weapons should be available to private citizens, and I respect them for their consistency, there aren’t enough of them to bother having that argument at this time.

So let’s grant for a moment that the 2nd amendment is about personal self-defense. This seems like a good right to have. What sort of self-defense requires a fully-automatic rifle with a 30+ round clip? A pistol is more portable for when you’re out in public, and a shotgun or pistol or rifle is more than adequate for any imaginable home-defense scenario. Turns out I had a very limited imagination, because I thought in terms of individual criminals, and not in terms of all of society turning against me.

I was enlighten when a friend shared this video. At the 4:13 mark we are told what defensive use assault rifles have – the 1992 Rodney King Riots in LA. Supposedly a man held back a mob of looters with an assault rifle. These weapons are indeed handy if society has collapsed and a mob has turned on you. The obvious question to ask is – does the protection afforded by these weapons in such scenarios outweigh the harm of having these weapons widely available? Since such scenarios are already incredibly rare I doubt they’re worth the cost in criminal carnage. A few dozen shops being looted every decade is a reasonable price to pay for reducing the incidents of mass-murders.

But there’s a second question that comes up. A much less charitable one – what sort of person imagines they’d get use from this sort of weapon? Who views themselves as surrounded by violent criminals that are held at bay only by his own firepower? Not just opportunistic criminals – those are easily discouraged by a regular rifle or shotgun. This sort of weapon is for holding off a large mob that is determined to kill you. Is this not the hallmark of the racist? One who fears that as soon as the Law is no longer there to protect him all the minorities around him will rise up and consume him? An AK isn’t of much use against a tyrannical government, but it sure can mow down the dark-skinned savages that are rushing your suburban survivalist compound…


EDIT – seems this is not news. Apparently the 2nd amendment was intended to keep the black people in control since the day it was penned. I like our new interpretation better. And in that spirit, I hold it shouldn’t protect assault weapons.

Jan 102013
 

200px-TheWayOfKingsThe Way of Kings, by Brandon Sanderson

Synopsis: An ancient evil draws close to consume the world in war. A prince attempts to unite his divided kingdom to resist it, a scholar seeks lost legends for clues to its nature, and a slave rises to become a savior.

Brief Book Review: Pure awesome. Nevermind the great fight scenes, the creepy-as-hell Outsiders intruding into the world, the rich but lost history of gods on earth, and the constant growing sense of doom. All that is great, but what really sets this book apart is its idealization of the human spirit. This is a book of Capital Letter Ideals. Honor. Loyalty. Duty. Empathy. These characters are archetypes of the things we most aspire to be. Unless you have a frigid heart of stone, this story will stir things in you. Strongly recommended.

Club Review: Unfortunately the size is a problem, over 1000 pages. It’s too long for an average book club and we had to read it over several sessions. But once you start it goes much faster than you’d expect, it’s very hard to stop reading when you get into it. While much of the talk will likely be praise, there are actually several things to argue about that make this more than a simple gushing event – choices the characters make that the readers may disagree over. It’s not as interesting a discussion as more ambivalent books may spark, but it’s such a good read that people likely won’t mind. Recommended.

Dec 172012
 

stinger-missileI don’t want to get too involved in the gun-control debate, because I don’t actually know which side I support. Obviously fully-automatic weapons should be banned, as should high-capacity magazines, as the only thing they’re good for is indiscriminate mass carnage. Aside from that, I don’t have a strong degree of confidence in either side’s claims.

I am intensely annoyed by one thing though – the occasional refrain by the pro-gun side that the 2nd Amendment is there to protect the American populace from a government-imposed tyranny. This is complete crap, everyone knows it, and yet it’s still brought up sometimes.

Maybe in the day of muskets and cavalry charges this was true (maybe). But it’s obviously absurd to claim that now. Small-caliber handguns cannot compete with a modern military force in any way. A military force can field tanks, long-range artillery, attack helicopters, and unmanned drones. And (aside from the drones) that’s all ancient technology. To actually resist a military incursion the 2nd Amendment would have to allow private citizens to own heavy ordnance and high-explosives at the minimum. Every successful modern resistance has been supplied and/or supported by a foreign nation.

No one believes that the 2nd Amendment SHOULD allow those things. So it’s not about stopping a domestic tyranny. Stop pretending it is.

Dec 052012
 

There’s a bit of a dust-up on the interwebz – Evolutionary Psychology vs Feminism. The below was originally posted by me on Less Wrong.

If there was a scientific field (Evolutionary Sociology) that declared rationalism is harmful for humanity – that Less Wrong need to be destroyed, long-time readers found and re-educated so they will not be a threat to society, and the pursuit of rationality in general to be shunned or persecuted – I suspect that the vast majority of us would not accept these claims at face value and would look to see if their research was flawed, or their conclusions didn’t follow. And if we found such evidence, we’d probably shout it from the rooftops.

Evo-Psych is, not infrequently, used as a weapon against women.

The case made for these claims is often very bad.

Every hunting man had a gatherer mother; every gathering woman had a hunting father.

This is the problem for the evolutionary psychology of sex differences: for each trait that you want to claim is a product of selection for a behavior that is different between sexes, you have to postulate a Plus that restricts its expression to a single sex.

So, sure, tell me that humans evolved cognitive mechanisms to aid in navigating by landmarks for better fruit and tuber searching, and I might well believe it to be reasonable; now tell me why you think it would only operate in women, and how it would be actively suppressed by genetic mechanisms in men. Then you can tell me why navigating by distance and direction is actively shut off in women. You’re the ones who like purely adaptive explanations: why would there be an advantage to individuals having each only half the suite of potential genetic navigation tools switched on?

If Evo-Psych is used by sexists the same way that Eugenics was used by totalitarians, it will suffer the same stigma and be abandoned for decades the same way. Seeing as this is a self-defense move by a traditionally oppressed group, I don’t blame them. Unless the crap is weeded out quickly the whole field will be disgraced. The victims are currently only pointing out all the crap, they didn’t allow it to get in there in the first place. The gatekeepers need to stop sleeping on the job, rather than trying to defend their prior shoddy performance.